The 33rd Installment of Dragon Rap Battles Features Waldo against Carmen Sandiego to see who is the better hider until Bigfoot comes in to try and take down both of them as they team up on him.
Thinking you would win would have your head in the clouds
Cause you're battling someone who can blend with the crowd
The best hider has been hired by the one and only Chief
To stop the V.I.L.E. of a red fedora travelling thief!
I say this human Sly Cooper has a ton of flaws
Maybe she should've learned from my rival, Odlaw
You may have stolen treasures as a thief so globally
But you should return to ACME as their Wild E. Coyote!
Wrong ACME Wally, I'm gonna need a map
Cause where in the world did you learn to rap?!
Though a criminal at large, I remain gorgeous
You're only hiding all because of Chuck Norris
I'm a mind behind a criminal syndicate, in which you should fear
Cause I'll make you more pale than your friend, Whitebeard
I got a postcard from Wilma, she says you ain't slick
Cause she left you because she couldn't find your dick!
You're not stealing this rap as you probably acclaimed
Because nobody wants to play your educational games!
Not even Death or Liam Neeson would know where i'm hiding
While you have little kids saying "Swiper No Swiping!"
You're gonna get schooled straight from your book shelves
Should've stayed at The Land of Waldos where you could touch yourself
You lost your left shoe there, where you should've stayed put
Maybe you should get bigger shoes for your big foot
Did somebody say Bigfoot? Cause this ain't no myth!
Think these Rednecks can beat me? HA! As If!
This cryptid sasquatch is ready to conquer
Repping The Abominable Snowman and The Loch Ness Monster
Since the 1960s I remain today attune
While these two have recieved some lousy cartoons
Cause i'm the one on the run being searched by the mass
But now i'm gonna use my Bigfoot to kick some ass!
Waldo and Carmen:
A Sasquatch serving us? That is just silly!
The Searches are only by some Southern Hillbillies
Out alone in the woods eating nothing but deerskin
Until you flopped with Henry and The Hendersons
So let this Bipedical Humanoid give the confession
This Mythological being is only a legend
Like Wetherall on a clay on a toy marine route
Saquatch and The Yeti are only just gorilla suits!
This ain't no gorilla suit! I give the scientists hysteria!
As I walk all over in the woods of North America
Cause my disses are known to be incredibly beastly
Since you puny humans are an inferior species!
- The beat used in this battle is called Free Rap Beat 7 - |Hidden Valley| Freestyle Violin Instrumental Hip-Hop Music and can be found here
- This battle was also helpfully written by GravityMan
- Bipedical is mispelled as Biomedical